Sunday, February 6, 2011

LET'S SUPER BOWL!

Today is the Super Bowl. As you can tell by its title, this game is either "very good" or "excellent" or an extra or unwanted game. Though, given its immense popularity, I'm guessing it's not the latter.

It's occurred to me that when watching the Super Bowl – or any televised competitive game – that a side must be chosen. I have less than an hour to overcome my ambivalence and express a preference for one team over the other. Given that I haven't seen any of this seasons' games and know virtually nothing about either team, this is going to either very challenging or completely arbitrary.

Seriously, how does a sportz ignorant such as myself pick a side?!

Let's start with basics, look at our options and weigh their pros and cons:

GREEN BAY PACKERS
[+]Green Bay, Wisconsin sounds like a pretty boring place - however it 1. sounds kind of like Green Day, and 2. was name-dropped in NOFX's "Punk Guy". So far, Green Bay is feeling pretty punk rock to me.

[-]They have poor taste in team colors. Green and yellow? This team has a Limon Twist that isn't sitting right with me.

[+]Wisconsin is well known for exporting delicious cheeses. Hence, their team is named for the men and women who make their livings packing these cheeses into containers. I appreciate these working class vibes.

PITTSBURGH STEELERS
[-]A few great bands have come from Pennsylvania: The Dead Milkmen, The Human Beinz, Atom and his Package, but all those are from Philadelphia or Youngstown. Even after a decent amount of research, the only band I can find from Pittsburgh is Rusted Root. Not very rock n roll, Pittsburgh.

[+]What's up wit this helmet logo? most teams just have a mascot or the first letter of their name. These guys have some weird three star shit going on. I don't know what this means, and I don't know what a "Steeler" is. So, I feel like there's perhaps some mysterious masonic, illuminati shit going on behind this team. I like it.

eh. okay. i've got 2 pros for Green Bay and only one for Pittsburgh.

GREEN BAY IT IS!

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